Jan 2, 2008

That Does It. I'm Moving To Florida.

What's wrong with this picture? Besides the smiling sun? Smug sumabitch. At least he's all warm and happy.

Check out the weather advisory for all of us thick-blooded Southerners. We'll have to stock up on some 10-weight just to keep our blood circulating:

A cold Arctic airmass combined with northwest winds of around 10
to 15 mph and gusty will create dangerous wind chill readings of
about 15 to 20 degrees over most areas later tonight and early
Thursday... with northern Duval and eastern Nassau counties
possibly having wind chills of 12 to 15 degrees early Thursday
morning.

That ain't right.

I've been through ice storms here, once, and I have a picture of my place of business, from back in 1950, all covered in snow. Snow in the palms trees is something to see. In pictures.

We had an engine block crack on Christmas when it stayed below freezing for over 36 hours. In Florida. We've had snow two different years on March 1st, but it was gone by 11:00 a.m. and we were in shorts and sweaters by noon.


The sun is overrated in his job performance. Slacker.

Time for the hot tub.

Update: Some folks seem to think this kind of cold is nothing to get all excited about. Well, I wouldn't either, but here in the weather-land of "We're All Gonna Die" hurricane-style reporting, they can sure drum up some scary alarmism. Prolly just to keep all of us 10W-40 types from losing vital parts, they post this on every weather website for this zip code:

A WIND CHILL ADVISORY MEANS THAT THE COMBINATION OF COLD AIR AND
WIND SPEEDS WILL CREATE DANGEROUSLY LOW WIND CHILL VALUES. THE
WIND CHILL TEMPERATURE IS HOW COLD IT FEELS WHEN OUTSIDE BASED ON
THE RATE OF HEAT LOSS FROM EXPOSED SKIN CAUSED BY WIND AND COLD.

See? Heat loss in the age of Global Warming. Be afraid! Like we don't have enough sense to come in outta the cold. Sheesh.

18 comments:

Jim - PRS said...

Shirtsleeve weather, that.

Joan of Argghh! said...

No way, Jimbo. The weather advisories here are pretty sure we're all gonna die from exposure!

Erica said...

Good. After all that November "I'll be by the pool...Slacking!" bullshit, while my teeth were chattering and fingertips were blue...serves you right.

Not that I want you to catch a draft or nothing, so make sure you button up when you go outside. Because, I do heart you, after all.

Mizz E said...

Gurl - I knows your pain - it's gonna get down to 24 in Mayberry tonight. 2 Dog Night, I only got one and no hot tub. I'm thinking it's time to head south of the border.

Bou said...

I stacked all sorts of blankets on the boys' beds and told them, "Oil is over $100 a barrel, I'm not heating this frickin' house." Heh.

Bones kept saying, "But Mom, I don't get it... how cold and why? I don't get it..." You don't get what you don't know.

Erica said...

My palms bleed for you. Right now, it's 21°F in the 11235 zip code [dat's me!] and it feels like 4°F.

I say, do as the northerners do: Make yourself some hot coco with marshmallows, wear three layers of clothing, and snuggle with a good book.

Truman Capote short stories are perfect for days like this.

Wait'll Zoooma see this post. He'll laugh at all of us, with his -32°F temps in Alaska.

USS Ben USN (Ret) said...

Ah yes, Florida! The sunshine state! Heh!
Stay warm, Joan!

Er, does this mean oranges n' maters are goin' up again?

USS Ben USN (Ret) said...

BTW, gotta new franken'puter!
Y'know what that means?
Means I'll be hangin' out here and buggin' you! Heh! :^)

GUYK said...

Yeah, it's a bit chilly here on sweetthing's half acre this morning..I saw that the treerats had built a bon fore to keep warm and damn if the birds were not all sitting around it with them singing that Kumbala Kumbala stuff. I would invite then in for coffee but that one tree rat gets to wired on jumpstart...

Suzette said...

Can you please go out there and fling yourself across the oranges to protect them? I don't mind paying $100 for a barrel of oil but I'll be damned of I'm going to pay that for a bag of oranges.

Teresa said...

And I'm not even IN Florida. I thought the only time you people got cold weather was when I was in the state.

I've been there twice and each time it's been "cold" (a relative term since I was living in Chicago)... I had expected that going south would warm things up - but I was still wearing coats. heh.

Jean said...

THIS SUCKS!...... sorry. Lost control for a sec.

I went to bed last night in jeans, t-shirt, sweatshirt, jacket and a big heavy bathrobe. AND a space heater on full blast. Sheesh!

We lost an engine block, too, in that year you mentioned. Where were we at the time?? Visiting my family for Christmas...in Ohio... where the wind-chill was -50 and snow was 3 feet deep. Not a good year.

My fingertips are so cold they hurt right now.

Jean said...

Someone said it snowed in Deltona??
holy crap!

Joan of Argghh! said...

Early this morning, before looking at the weather panic on Drudge, I wondered aloud, "is is snowing?"

The last I had looked, it was a clear morning, but lowering clouds were scudding up from the southeast... which would make for perfect conditions for snow.

I couldn't see very well from the kitchen through the living room, but it almost seemed like a very light sleet coming down. Didn't last long.

Joan of Argghh! said...

Ben, you got a new computer and you haven't broken it yet?

Hope it's water-proof...

:o)

Holder said...

It was 17 degrees- Fahrenheit!!- at 8 am here in West Georgia. But just think of all those pesky ants and other creepy crawlies that are dying this very instant! Woot!

Sparrow said...

I read in the news this morning that it was so cold in Florida that frozen iguanas were dropping out of the trees! That's something you don't see every day...

Joan of Argghh! said...

Yeah, raining Iguanas. Add that to list of "tropical paradise" amenities!