Jun 10, 2008

Medicinal Purposes

So what if I have emergency chocolate in my medicine cabinet? My particular choice contains almonds, an important and nutritious snack food. And lots of magnesium. It's a medical necessity; s0 shut up.

Some people keep "cough syrup" around for medical purposes. Uh-huh. I'm not talking about meth-lab crank fodder, just the ol' fifth of bourbon under the sink back behind the roll of trash bags. Man, did the J.R. and I have to sweet talk our way out of a situation when booze was discovered in our cabinets one time! Living in Mexico, it really was a medical necessity to have some sort of strong libation handy to break up the bronchial blockages caused by the smog of 20 million people and their cars. Nothing like black snot every morning to keep you alert to the danger around you! But it was a no-no in our line of work.

Just today I was thinking of how I strangely pick up chocolate in mass quantities every now and then. Not like, every 30 days, which would be normal. Maybe every 90. But it catches me by surprise because it's almost unconscious when I come home from Publix with 10 little packs of chocolate almonds because they were on sale 10 for $10. I just don't do that but a few times a year. I arrive home, unpack the groceries and go, wha... what? I can only conclude that it's my body taking over the inattentive mind. Must.have.chocolate.

'fess up. What do you keep in your "morality usually frowns on this" medicine cabinet that you would have to explain away? No, really, it's for the pain. Uh.... that's not mine... er... you would not believe how that just clears a cold right up! But secretly, you bought it and keep it handy, maybe more than handy, because some days the ol' bod just screams for Cheetos?

I think our bodies are smarter than we are, but we just don't listen all the time. What's that, body? We need key lime pie because our vitamin C deficiency is ruining concentration? Alrighty then!

14 comments:

pamibe said...

Ohmygod, I am so boring.

Joan of Argghh! said...

What? Whatever do you mean? I bet you do lines of Pixie Stix when you're home alone...

:o)

.

QP said...

I'm with the guy who said: "Pass by me with a plate of Choxie, Godiva and three CPs & I'll pass up the 1st two for the CPs. About once a year, I'll spy & buy a bag at a convenience store and have them all eaten before I reach home.

Erica said...

omg! omg! omg! I was just talking about this at work yesterday and today...how WEIRD!

We are having the heatwave from hell right now and my body is telling me lots of stuff, like eat lots of lowfat key lime pie yogurt, and gorge yourself on blueberries and raspberries...with cool whip (low fat). It all has to be frozen, too...I loves me some frozen fruit. Mmmmmmm.

Favorite food that I know I should avoid, but need like crack: Stouffer's Microwavable Mac & Cheese. Dear God, I use my fingers to clean out the container...I have zero chance of overcoming this addiction.

Joan of Argghh! said...

I'm not doctor, Erica, but I'm guessing you have both D and C deficiencies. Makes sense, right? Fruits and milk products.

The only way to know for sure, is to buy just the vitamins next time you have craving...

:o)

Joan of Argghh! said...

qp, you'd better go check out Bent Objects for your CP fix.

LauraB said...

Sync - was just looking at Bent Objects today for the first time in months.

My Mother's Helper? Well, I have to admit I've surrendered to that Baker's Chocolate Semisweet block in a pinch. But for a serious fix? That wee pint of Haagen Das (sp?) Vanilla Swiss Almond. With a kitchen towel wrapped around it to keep my paws from freezing.

I KNOW that the copious amounts of pink grapefruit juice helped me kick the cigarette habit, though. Seriously - I went through that stuff like water but it helped.

Teresa said...

Definitely chocolate, but I have to watch how much I eat so it doesn't give me a migraine *sigh*

In winter I get those boxes of chocolate truffles from Whole Foods - they're about $5 and last me for about a week and a half. In summer WF is mean enough to stop selling this, so I have to go with those really dark 70% chocolate bars broken into pieces and kept in the refrigerator. Yum. I'll have to buy more tomorrow - I'm all out!

Irrelephant said...

My syster buys me one of those giant one-pounder Hershey's Special Dark bars every year for my birthday, one for Xmas and she saves one for just some moment that she feels I need one. That stuff is beyond exquisite. Three times a year, and that's plenty. You've never seen anyone nurse something until you see how long I can drag out a single pound of Special Dark bar.

Mrs. Who said...

Hersheys Cherry Kisses...kept in the freezer until they're needed. Which has been a lot recently.

QP said...

I'm fixed for life! Bless you.

wontletlifedefineme said...

Pretzels.

joated said...

Glad to know I'm not the only one with the choco-holic jones. I can go months without and then ---WHAM!---a large box of malted milk balls will be purchased and devoured all within an hour.

Forget Halloween! Only get two trick-or-treaters? That's a belessing! Good thing I planned on 40, 'cause now I've got all the minature candybas I need to get me through November.

Joan of Argghh! said...

"mother's helper" made me snortle!

Man, all you chocoholics out there, you realize of course, that this means that the Aztecs may have been conquered in the short term, but they've vanquished the rest of the world to a life of servitude to the cacao bean.

I like the civilized version of our chocolate nowadays, though. The Aztecs didn't know how to make it palatable. They'd mix it up with watery milk and cornmeal. blech!