Jun 26, 2009

People Buying Liquor are Happy, Usually.

But honestly, if you're being given a big discount coupon in the paper, would it be too much to ask you to cut it out? I have to bring scissors to work just to cut out coupons for every snotty Country Club member too good to have a pair. Take that how you will.

I know it's like the Disney World of Alcohol, but contain yourself enough to notice all of the signs screaming "Under 30? Please Show I.D." Don't act surprised, offended or peeved if I call you out on it. Just have the damn thing ready.

Don't bring your underage child, say, a young man of 17, into the store with you and then get all huffy if we ask for his I.D. We don't read minds, and can't assume that you're related. We really, really don't want to go to jail or lose our job. Or both.

And, get used to it, ya old farts. Just because your card looks like a credit card we still will ask, "debit or credit?" because get this: new cards can be very vague and versatile. The world has changed, pops, so don't lecture me with, "that's a credit card, young lady."

Speaking of old farts: the white haired white guys with the baggy basketball shorts and jersey and cap on backwards? Not.good. I'll card your saggy ass just to be consistent with your mental age.

Meanwhile, I'm having fun, even if I'm exhausted after a long shift. I been finding out which co-workers care way too much and what pushes their buttons. I forsee a bit of fun mischief in their future! Mwuahhahahaha!

Oh, and, I got muh first paycheck. Yippee!


Hammer said...

I used to hate selling booze. They would send in TABC agents to test the clerks with fake IDs and straw purchases. Too much hassle for a minimum wage job.

Velociman said...

You should spend your entire paycheck on booze. That would be a good recycling/circle of life kind of thing. Do you sell pretzels? Might need some of those, too.

Betsy said...

Joan I used to work in an independent grocery store in my nearby "country club" neighborhood where the locals could charge their groceries. Many customers wouldn't even bother to speak to me as I checked them out, they just waved their little pens at me to indicate that they were putting them on their charge accounts that they never paid. The grocer eventually went under. Good times. Great memories. Wonder if it's the same neighborhood, does it start with an O?

diamond dave said...

I've always hated jobs where I have to wait on customers. Don't have the patience for them.

On the upside, looks like I may have landed myself a job after six months of unemployment. Yay!

pamibe said...

I know I'm always happy when I go buy booze... but I've never used a coupon. What a marvelous idea! Don't worry, I have a pair of scissors. :D

PeggyU said...

I didn't even know you could get booze coupons. It is getting to be margarita weather. Where do you get booze coupons?

GUYK said...

Yeah, having to face customers every day can be a challenge and takes the patience of Job.

Good Luck!

Sam said...

I take the guys and gals who run the liquor store I frequent a big ass basket of fresh vegetables every time I go in. Obviously, we're on a first name basis. My stay in the store is usually between 30 min. and an hour...with political discussions and all. Of course, I live in a sleepy town.

Ex-Dissident said...

Joan, this story makes me want to come to your place of work an give you a hard time. On the other hand, the next time I go to the store to buy some etoh I will wonder if the person behind the counter is as gifted and interesting as you. Just like everyone else who frequents your site, I youget great pleasure from your writing would love to have a friend like you.