Because the government doesn't even know how to create jobs out of money, I'm here to help.
Here’s a plan: the government can give me 20 million dollars and I’ll make sure I employ 1000 people for the next year. I need a new home built, a chauffeur, a stylist, a publicist, and various assistants, suppliers and menial workers. I’ll need accountants and bookkeepers and an HR admin. I will not even start a business that produces anything, so there will be no failure and no hand out for extra money.
Just give me $20 million and turn me loose to buy all the luxuries Michelle Obama is enjoying, and I’ll employ all my friends and cronies and it’ll be copacetic and uncomplicated.
There. I think I now know everything necessary to run for Congress.