Aug 18, 2009

Scalp!

Caught me a dangerous criminal last night, peeps. Got a reward for it, too. Some stupid man-child didn't have the sense that Some Imaginary Being* gave a gnat, and came in with his buddy, who was buying the beer. It is our policy to card every person in the queue; i.e., if five chuckleheads come into the line together, you card them all.

This idjit didn't expect to get carded, since his buddy was buying the beer. So both presented their I.D.s and the paying customer was legit, but manchild handed me someone else's driver's license. He tipped me off by not looking at me, turning away to obstensibly view the shelf full of snacks. "Is this you?" I asked. He looked at me and said nothing. Definitely not him. Heh.

I called the manager over while I held the I.D. and for a minute there I thought we'd have an arrest, but he wised up and walked away before the manager could get there. His buddy swore he only met him earlier in the day. Yeah, right. No beer for you, either!

I'm not a fan of the 21 year-old age limit, but seriously? If you can't figure out a way to get your beer without going into the store, maybe you shouldn't be allowed to drink after all. I'm glad he was smart enough to leave when he was found out.

The hell of all of it is that the perp may spend a night in jail and a day in court with attendant aggravations, but anyone who unwittingly sells liquor to a minor will lose their job, pay a huge fine, and be unable to work in any place that sells alcohol for 5 years. You'll have more of a record than the perp.

So here's a tip: don't fuck with the sales clerks in liquor stores. They become quite humorless and unassailable, immune to your plight as an idiot because there's more at stake than your stupid sense of entitlement to respect or some such. Your sorry ass isn't worth their job.

It's been good training for me as a manager, to work the line for so many weeks. Just when I think I've seen it all. . .

Oh, and how fun it is to see so many bottles of Kim Crawford wine. Heh.

3 comments:

USS Ben USN (Ret) said...

Good eye, Joan!

That is purty dumb, for the kid to use someone elses drivers license.
Then there's the question of how he got it to begin with.

Good job! :^)

Skully said...

Dunderheads don't deserve no drink.

Van said...

"It's been good training for me as a manager"

Someone was smart enough to make you a manager? Someone in managment?

Huh.

;-)