Jan 21, 2010

Ear ache.

I have a painful lump just above the mandibular joint, in front of my ear. The dentist confirms it is not an abscess but that doesn't make it hurt less. Gotta give it time to see if it's just a subcutaneous cyst or whatever, but I have antibiotics to take in case it gets unruly. I feel like crap because it just sits there, putting pressure on my ear canal.

In my misery, I begin to miss my mom, who passed just a few years ago. You'd have to know what an unassailable hard-ass my mom was to understand how strange it is for me to miss her particular earache ministrations. She was a cold comfort for most ailments, but my many monstrous ear aches as a mermaid child of the Weekie Wachie River would knock my rambunctious enthusiasm and boundless energy into a lethargic level of concern. I remember her taking real pity on me, and poor starved runt of the large litter that I was, I drank it in like the life-giving nectar of some Shangri-La. She would sit and pull me to her and let me rest my head in her lap while she put a warm compress to my ear. She would buy me board games to play with her. Silly little games like Cap the Hat or some such that whiled away the television-free hours at the fishing camp.

We never missed the television when we were there, as there was much to do, places to roam, swim, boat, bike, and play. But in my pain, I may as well have been at home, bored and miserable. So the games were such a thoughtful thing, and the comforts were so loving and attentive, with no strings or chidings attached, that I suppose it's not for nothing for my ear to ache today, and my heart to ache along with it.

7 comments:

leeann said...

You sound like you need a warm compress and a cold drink.
Hope your Misery Lump gets sorted out quickly.

Jean said...

Even when you 'talk to yourself', you are eloquent.




wv: palsi (good grief!)

pamibe said...

Hope the lump and corresponding ache is sorted out quickly!

I know what you mean about your mom; mine has been gone for three years and really much longer than that... but every time I get sick I want her. She possessed a nice, comfortable lap and ample bosom to ensconce oneself against when the evils struck.

Feel better!

julie said...

Funny how those heart aches, even when they're extra painful, can be kind of sweet. You had to have felt that loving comfort, to know what you're missing.

Still, it is an ache - I hope both subside soon, and with a minimum of fuss.

wv says you should restsmore

LauraB said...

You bring a tear and a memory of my own comfort - her hand slowly and softly settling my hair behind my ear. Over and over. "Do my ear, ma..." I would say - the last time when I was quite near 35 years old. Her arthritic hand shortened that ministration but she tried, anyway.

I'd give a great deal to be able to ask her once more...

Get well soon, m'dear!

patti said...

Oh goodness, Hope you are better soon!

And I hope my children one day love me the way you love your mom. That was just lovely

PeggyU said...

I'll loan you my Mommy until your ear feels better! She's pretty good at that sort of thing. :)