Jan 29, 2010

Too Many Zombie Movies

Because the HillBuzz boys asked, I gave them this suggestion for an "Operation Game" illustrating the correct way to dissect trolls:

Dissection kills the subject. If you do it right, you’ll want to cut the jugular vein first. Then you have a compliant and useful troll. So, the first thing you must do is cut off the life-blood: attention.

Then it’s all political sausage-making and naked shaming.

Pull down the troll’s genes and expose the horn of the dilemma: quest for power. Trolls don’t really have much of a brain above the neck to consider, for them it’s all about fucking up the comments and making themselves the center of your paid-for blog. So, with the attention-whore vein cut, it’s time to remove the Power Tool with a swift banning of their IP addy.

After that, there’s really not much else to do except render the fatuous lies out of the husk, leave their head stuffed up the ass where it usually is, and threaten to suet their ass.

Using their thigh-bone as a scepter is optional.

I seriously need to quit watching Deadwood.


julie said...

I've never watched Deadwood, but I'd pay to see you eviscerate trolls. Awesome.

leeann said...

No no no, you need to watch and assimilate MORE Deadwood. These days, we need all the Al-think we can get.

dogette said...

Deadwood is always going to be my favorite show. Period. This post made me think of Al talking to the Indian head in the box. Remember that? Oh how I miss that show. Time to re-watch the DVDs all over again.

Velociman said...